Just when I thought I was all cried out .... Death Sucks Part II

Hi all,

I meant to post this on Friday night, but after the events that took place, I just didn't have the energy once I finally got the kids to bed that night. So it's a little late, but here's the latest adventure from Kim's Korner ...........


It seems whenever I'm sending out a mass email recently, it's cause I'm sad about something ... and today unfortunately is no different. Last night (Thurs Apr 26) we lost someone else in our 'circle'. Hershey, our dog of 5 yrs, who some of you met and knew, was let out accidentally by one of the kid's friends last night, and was hit and killed by a car. Two cars actually. The first lady stopped, which was very nice of her, and from the witness accounts, he still might have had a chance at that point, but then an SUV came along and smoked him again, and although the person slowed down, the asshole didn't stop. You can't tell me you can hit a 50+lb dog ... see a kid freaking on the side of the road, and not realize you hit something.

It all started just after 8:30pm. Hershey made his great escape, and the kids left to walk their friend home (5 houses away or so) about 10 min later. They saw Hershey walking in front of them, called out to him, and of course once he saw them, he thought they were coming after him, so he made a run for it right into the road. When they first saw him, the little girl had started going up to her house to grab a leash, and the boys were standing in her driveway when the car came along and hit him. Alec and Adam saw the whole thing. I'm very sad about that. As much as Hershey was 'Mom's Boy' ... he was Alec's best friend, and to have him see that, a head on collision with his dog ... my son's never going to forget that. It's just one of those life altering events that stays with you.

Adam came running back to the house for me, their friend ran into her house and called me on the phone at the same time, and poor Alec was freaking in/beside the street.

I do have a couple of things to be thankful for .... 1) that in all the chaos, that Alec wasn't hit himself. and 2) that Hershey didn't suffer long cause he was still alive when I got there.

When I got down the street to everything, the little girl's mom was out in the street directing traffic around Hershey cause he was still in the middle of the road on the yellow line. He was still alive, but the only thing moving was his head as he turned it slightly to look at me. And he never made a sound. He was looking at me with those huge chocolate brown eyes, and there wasn't a thing I could do for my boy except drag his broken body off the road and over to the side and sit with him until he was gone.

I was sitting on the road with him, rubbing his head, the kids had gone to a neighbours house to call their dad, and someone suggested that we had to 'take him somewhere'. Not thinking, I jumped up and started to clear out the back of my SUV to make room for him, realized it was going to be a futile effort cause I was just throwing things around from one side to another in the back, and not really moving anything and so I went back to him just as he died.

Paul (the ex) showed up and called his friend who had a large truck that we could put him in the back of to get him back to our place.

Not sure who called the police. Someone must have though cause within minutes of my reaching the scene, one cop car arrived, then a second a few minutes later. Poor guy, I felt bad for him too cause there's really nothing they can do for anyone at that point except take info and direct trafffic.

Tonight after work, Paul will come over again and we'll be burying Hershey in the back yard, next to Shelby. Our cat who he loved to chase for most of his 5 yrs until she died a couple of years ago.

As much as I cursed his hair around the house, the fact he got into the garbage, the fact he chased the old cat and new one .... I'm really going to miss that damn dog!!! :-( He loved us very much, and we loved him too. He was Alec's best friend and my protector. He was the reason I wasn't afraid to be 'alone' at nights after the separation. I knew I had Hershey and he'd rip anyone apart who ever tried to hurt his family.

The house was very quiet last night after the boys went to bed. I kept thinking I'd hear him walking around upstairs, getting into the garbage or jumping on Alec's bed ... and every time of course I was wrong.

I know it's just a dog. But any pet owners out there will understand that animals DO become part of your family and it hurts very much to lose them. Hell ... I started crying walking by the stupid garbage bag sitting in the kitchen last night, cause I knew I'd never again have to say "HERSHEY!!!! GET OUT of the garbage!!!!!!!"

It was a very long and hard night. Both boys ended up in my bed, and it was almost 1am before Alec was able to even close his eyes. They kept waking up and wanting to talk about it. Long night. Today, although we were all late, the kids went to school and I came to work. I'm writing this on my 'lunch hour'. I thought being with their friends at school today would keep the boys minds busy, and they wouldn't focus as much on being sad while they were with their friends.

Funny how kids minds work .... as I was getting ready for work, I thought Adam was being VERY quiet in the kitchen. Then I heard the back door close. I looked out the bathroom window and saw him walking to the garage with a piece of paper in his hand. Then he came back, got something else, and left it with Hershey. He had written him a 'good bye, I love you' poem, and left him his 'blankey' for the day, so he wouldn't be cold or lonely in the garage today :-(

Sigh ... did I mention Death Sucks!!!!!!

Whatever freakin' cosmic test these last couple of weeks have been ... I'd better be passing!!!!!

That's it. That's the news of the day. Sorry it couldn't be more cheerful, but there's just nothing happy about losing a family member .... even if he was a four legged one.

K.

UPDATE:*************************

We ended up burying Hershey in the back yard, next to Shelby on Friday night, (in the rain no less ... how appropriate lol) had a little funeral with some neighbourhood kids, and then I watched Happy Feet with the boys until they both fell asleep in my bed again.

They're already talking about a new puppy of course, but I told them I wanted a bit of time before we jump into a new dog. Man, I hate the thought of going through the puppy stage again :-( We've discussed what our next dog will be, and have narrowed it down to either a Golden Retriever or a Shephard. I've been trying to gather pro's and con's for both. Still doing the research/reading on both, and haven't decided on either yet. I did manage to talk them out of a Beagle though. Since those guys are runners also, it wouldn't be a good type of dog for where we live right now.

Whatever our next dog will be ... it HAS to be the type that won't look to bolt the minute it gets the chance. We live on a FAR too busy road for that type of dog .... either that .... or we move I guess ;-) And yes, our next dog will DEFINITELY go to 'training'.

This is a new week ... today's a new/better day .... and although we'll always love him, it doesn't hurt as much today to think about and miss him.

Later all!!!

K.