Wednesday, February 21, 2007

When GOOD kids do STUPID things!!!

Hi all, here's my rant for the day...

Usually, I have smart, conscientious, 'good' kids. Usually. Last night however, they did something I'd consider pretty STUPID!!!! I never call my kids stupid, I don't even tell them that things they do are sometimes stupid. I usually try and use another description, even if it has the same meaning lol... but last night ... my kids did something that was just plain STUPID!!!!

After supper/homework, they were outside playing with the little girl from down the street, and the next thing I know, Adam and Haley are running in the house saying "Someone's coming Mom !!!" Just as I get to the front door asking, "What do you mean someone's coming?" "And where's Alec?!?!?!" I open the door and there's Alec standing there with a man next to him. The man was pretty shaken up and said "just wanted to let you know your kids were playing in the middle of the road and I almost hit them".

First thing I did was lose it on all three of them (yes, Haley included, she was involved, she gets the mom tirade ... even if it's not from her own mom lol). Verbally of course, not physically. Then I made the boys immediately walk Haley home and come right back cause their playtime was now OVER!!!

When they returned a few minutes later, after I had calmed down a bit, I let Alec tell 'his side' of it because he was adamant that they weren't on the road. According to him, they were next to the road. He said they were shoveling snow from the sidewalk into the ditch, and were making a fort, and he had gone around the school bus that had been parked on the side of the road, which meant he was actually ON the road. Absolutely NO excuses to be on the road. They know the rules!!!!

I told him if someone felt they had to stop, get out of their car and come up to the house, they were obviously closer to the road than they should have been. I told them that playing chicken with cars (as the man had implied) was just plain STUPID!!!! Yes. I actually used that word! And to use their heads, and they KNOW how dangerous our road specifically and cars in general are!!!! Told them to use the brains they were given for good ... not evil ... not trying to figure out if they can play chicken with a car on a dark winter night!

I was just floored. These kids know better!!!! They know the rules of playing outside. They know what that road is like!!! I really don't know if Buddy over reacted, or if they were actually on the road like he said ... but it's so frustrating that you can teach your kids right from wrong, and KNOW that they know the difference, but yet they'll still take stupid chances and make stupid mistakes when they're out of sight.

Originally they WERE grounded for a very long time. Right after the man left, Alec kept saying "But mom, we were just ....." and I kept cutting him off saying "I don't care!!!! I don't care WHAT you were doing .... YOU WERE ON THE ROAD!!!!!!" Then I realized I couldn't do that. If I ever want him to talk to me about the BIG stuff ... I guess I have to listen when he's trying to talk ..... so after my own little time-out while they walked Haley home, I told him I was ready to listen to what he had to say. Even today, he's still adamant they weren't playing chicken, but that they were shoveling snow. And that Adam and Haley weren't even on the road, but on the SIDE of the road near the ditch.

I would love to believe Alec. And I really want to because I know lying to me isn't something he usually makes a habit of doing. But ..... why would someone stop if the kids hadn't scared the sh*t out of him? So ... I have to go on the premise that *SOMETHING* happened .... Regardless ... they were closer than they should have been. And they shouldn't have even been where they were ... they were SUPPOSED to be playing in Haley's back yard. Not in the ditch out front.

Since I didn't see it happen, and couldn't verify what had actually happened .... I still grounded them, but not *forever* as I originally told them :-) But we had a VERY long talk about safety, our road in particular, the fact that kids were killed in a car accident there last year because it's a dangerous road, people go WAY to fast on it, and I told them that that's been my biggest fear since they started playing outside, on their own this past year ... is that one of these times, someone is going to come to our door and tell me something happened to one of them (that they don't come home at all is the other fear!). I told them that when they go out to play, I turn off the tv, radio, stero, everything, and keep the house silent so I can hear ... just in case ... if there's any trouble outside. I hope I got through to them ....

I think / hope from my reaction last night that they realize they had REALLY done wrong ... and hopefully ... I won't have to worry about it happening again. I WILL worry about it of course ... and keep checking the windows while they're gone ... even if it's only a few houses down the street .... but I'm hoping that from now on, they'll make better choices about WHERE they're going to play. Where they've already been told countless times .... absolutely NOWHERE near the road!!! ;-)

Sigh ... I don't think I'm going to make it to their teens!!!!! Where's that bottle of Vodka?!?!??!???!?!? KIDDING!!! ;-P

Have a great night all!

K.

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